I called it as D Sunday Depression

This is the third week of Sunday I'm feeling super down...
Yesterday, surprisingly I was feeling down, even though I was with a bunch of friends watching footy in a bar.
I realise...that I can't stay at home everyday...just like today.
Home is giving me depression, and brother's music is annoying. Prob it's because I find it loud.

I wish I was a computer so I can delete stuffs that I do not want to remember.
It's not that I do not want to remember. It's actually sweet memories that I do want to keep it.
But, those memories are torturing me.
It's just like how Bella reacted when Edward left her. Well...I wasn't as dramatic as the movie.
And I do realise that crying would make me feel better. The issue is, I got no tears already.
Tears won't come down in the third week. Maybe u would assume, hey I'm doing alright.
But the truth is, I am not.
I still can feel the suffer in me. Just that I can handle better than the last two weeks.

They said it's all in my head. If I want to do it, then the prob will solve as time goes by.
If I keep saying I can't, then my prob will remain unsolved. My torturous days would keep going.
Shit! Can't believe this is the third week. Eh, on second thought, it's just the end of second week.
Third week is starting this Monday.
Wow! Time is passing by so slow.
You know, I really really just want to lie down and do nothing. I want no distraction. I want to be in a room with me, myself and I.
I just want quiet. I do not want people asking me whether have I taken my lunch or dinner.

I wonder if eating a tub of ice cream will make you feel better?
I doubt so coz I am not craving for ice cream, but alcohol.
Why most people will opt for alcohol?
Speaking from my own experience, it's because alcohol is my best friend when it comes to sadness. Errr....doesn't make sense at all...
I wouldn't say alcohol wash away my problems... Because I know damn well that the problem will still be there the next day.
Fuck! I'm seriously fucked up!
Just because of.....and my life is all screwed up. FML!!
How can I be this weak? How can I?

Aaargh!!! I do not want problem. Just go away......